finding the right fit
for those people like me who have already graduated, just look back . . . and for those who are still studying, perhaps you might be able to relate to this . . .
oh well . . . not that i’m a delinquent student (c’mon i had been a good student *wink*), but i remember back then, i hated sundays. why? because after sunday comes monday and the start of a long week in school . . . todo aral at puyat na naman. i remember back then, every monday morning as i drive on my way to up, i always play "manic monday" by the bangles . . . sakto kasi e . . . haha
so anyway, when i started working . . . things have changed. not that i’m looking forward to the new week but i was indifferent . . . it’s just a normal day whether i’m at work or not. i don’t know, i guess because when you’re at work, it’s like living in another home and the people you’re with are just a different set of friends . . . you have good times and bad as well . . . but most of all, you don’t have quizzes every now and then. 
then i recall . . . months ago, i experienced the same thing . . . i was dreading sundays . . . because i feared work. i feared hearing another negative issue about me . . . it disrupts the good atmosphere you’re supposed to have at work. how can you be comfortable working if you’re not at ease as you think everyone around you is an enemy?
i admit i was hurting back then, and i guess what was worse was the fact that at that time, i was afraid of trusting people . . . it’s hard when people don’t seem to cooperate with you . . . because they’re older they have the right to not obey you . . . but being more educated, you’re being pressured to take good measures . . . but i can’t do it alone . . . and it was hard . . .
but then comes the best part . . . it’s just fulfilling whenever you realize that things are falling into place . . . i’m totally happy right now as i think i’ve found where i fit best . . . i’m surrounded with great and supportive people . . . people who care and people who believe in what you’re capable of doing . . . people who are willing to share everything that they know . . . a true guide in life . . .
and so now . . . i’m no longer fearing sundays . . . because it’ll be another learning experience for me . . . i need not name names again . . . lalaki na ulo ng mga ‘yan! hahahaha
you know . . . i do consider it as a blessing . . . siguro kailangan mo nga talaga minsan maghirap muna bago ibigay sa iyo ‘yung pinagdadasal mo, ‘no? and when people say god knows when the right time is . . . now i’m believing in that . . . i guess he really knows when it’s time . . . when you’re already on the verge of losing grip totally . . . ‘pag nawalan ka na ng bilib sa sarili mo . . . ibibigay n’ya ‘yung something which will make you feel special, needed, and worth being part of . . .
–GI 30682
thoughts | Comment (0)i miss cebu
ok . . . in a few hours it’s gonna be christmas na . . . a first for me . . . i mean a first christmas where things aren’t like what used to be in the past . . . oh well . . . there’s nothing i can do naman, ‘di ba? it’s hard to compete with fate . . .
so anyway, as i’m slowly recalling how the year went for me . . . i just couldn’t help but look back on one of the most memorable experiences for me this year . . . cebu . . .
it was quite an adventure i had . . . the first day spent with mommy mai (and of course, ang boy-hunting na ginawa ko sa airport haha) and pagmamakaawang kumain ako (na hindi ko ginawa dahil tinitigan ko lang silang kumain ng dinner) . . . and of course the rest of the experience shared with gailie.
ok . . . so what will i remember the most? let me list it down . . . random ito ha . . .
- mango shake (syet . . . i miss the mango shake na)
- the whole thursday experience . . . pati na rin ‘yung friday . . . gets to ng buong tropa . . . haha
- touched ako sa pagbuhat ni mommy mai ng bagahe ko sa airport . . . awwwww
- the memorable discussions i had with everyone . . . and the non-stop laughter . . .
- the hirit "jet-lag ka, ano?" hahaha
- the lalaking masahista . . . (shoots, ‘di pa rin kami over ni gailie dito . . . kahiya talaga . . . lalo pa ngang lumala ‘yung likod ko e)
- muntik na kaming ma-late sa flight namin pauwi (malay ba naming si gma ay biglang lumipad sa cebu? na-stress pa tuloy si mamang taxi driver dahil sa amin . . . haha . . . talk about photo-finish, ‘di ba gailie? maling linya nga lang ‘yung unang napilahan . . . haha)
- ang maingay na katabi namin sa plane (na ‘di pa lumilipad ay humihilik na . . . plus ang maingay n’yang laptop . . . talk about insensitivity na ‘di man alam na ‘yung mga katabi n’ya ay tulog . . .)
- ang nawawalang bagahe . . . (na nakasabit pala sa likod ko . . . hahaha)
- ang tirik moments pagkasundo sa amin (yeah, we were jinxed yata . . . haha)
- the party after (na umuwi ako agad dahil super sakit na ng likod ko . . . *sigh*)
- the coffee at rajah hotel (may i remind people that i was having 2 meals in cebu, ok?)
i know i’ve got tons of experiences there but these are really worth remembering . . . hahaha
i miss cebu . . . babalik kami ni gailie d’yan . . .
oh well . . . merry christmas, guys!
–GI 30682
Travel | Comment (0)trying to find the christmas spirit
i realized it’s less than 10 days until christmas . . . and like what i’ve told the others . . . i’m really not feeling it . . .
ok, it’s christmas . . . i know it’s christmas . . . i’m seeing christmas decorations everywhere . . . i’m seeing santa claus everywhere . . . lots of sales are offered inside malls . . . but basically that’s it . . . what else?
oh yeah! there’s more . . . more traffic . . . more people . . . talk about christmas rush, right? well, people are very much aware of it . . . i hate crowds . . . add the fact that christmas means slightly cold weather . . . which brings detriment to my poor aching back . . . (jusko, two years ko na yata dinadaing itong likod na ito . . . wala pa ring nangyayari . . . lumalala pa ata . . . and as much as i hate to admit it . . . i think the massage i had last thursday aggravated the pain . . . i never learn *sigh*).
hey! i’m not beeing a scrooge, ok? it’s just that i’m openly telling people i just don’t feel it’s already christmas . . . something’s missing for me . . . i don’t know . . . and the only reasons which help me agree that it’s really christmas are the things we hate about christmas . . .traffic and all other kinds of holiday rush. add the very well-thought of plan of mmda to work on their various road widening projects . . . jusko! traffic na nga e! pinalala pa . . . *sheesh* i just really do not understand why they love to do those road projects during these times instead of summer where a great majority of filipinos are out of the country on vacation.
i’m done with my christmas shopping a while ago and thank god it’s over. at least i can start resting my aching back na (yabang ko pa naman kanina to carry all those stuff i bought e medyo 30 pieces lang naman ‘yun. goodluck sa likod ni gi m a!).
i asked a couple of people if they feel it’s christmas already . . . well, they do . . . so it’s just really me . . .
i guess i’m just not used to it. i realized things aren’t same right now . . . it’s the first time we won’t be complete . . . and i don’t know how to face it. i guess i never figured it coming even when i was young . . . because i always thought that things will remain the way it is . . . complete. but it is an inevitable fact of life, i guess . . . and i guess i’m just in denial in telling myself nothing has changed.
and so, here i go again . . . the typical gi andres . . . wrapping her soft heart into a tough look . . . acting indifferent among the changes in her life . . . but deep inside, quite hurting (physically as well, hehehehe) as she does her best to hide her real thoughts . . . thank god for a couple of trusted people to talk to . . . i owe it to them . . . lalo na lately, ‘yung mga sinasabihan ko ng thoughts ko . . . i’m thankful for them . . . sila ron, heidi, rina, zia, si mommy mai . . . thank god for these people . . .
oh well . . . maybe i’ll be catching the christmas spirit in time . . . who knows?
–GI 30682
thoughts | Comment (0)